We’ve talked about consistency in feedback at number 7. Now, number 6 touches on something that makes or breaks a Carefrontation moment. It’s not about timing or frequency—it’s about emotional control.
#6: Letting Emotions Run the Show
One of the quickest ways to derail a productive conversation is letting your emotions take the lead. I’ve seen it happen in sales calls, team meetings, and manager–rep feedback sessions. Someone gets defensive, voices rise, and suddenly the conversation shifts from solving a problem to protecting egos.
The truth is, Carefrontation isn’t about avoiding emotion—it’s about managing it. The most effective salespeople I know don’t remove emotion from their communication; they channel it. They stay calm under pressure, even when things feel personal, and they focus on clarity instead of combat.
The same goes for managers. If you’re upset about a missed target or a sloppy handoff, that frustration might be valid. But if you go into a conversation leading with anger, you’re not going to get the best outcome—you’re going to get defensiveness.
A Carefrontation mindset requires pausing, grounding yourself, and asking: What’s my goal here? Do I want to prove I’m right, or do I want to help this person grow and help the team succeed?
For me, this lesson is a favorite because it’s something we can all work on, no matter where we are in our careers. Sales, by its nature, is emotional. But if you can manage your emotions in a way that creates space for collaboration instead of conflict, you’re going to build stronger relationships—both inside and outside your organization.
I’d love to hear from you: How do you personally keep emotions in check when conversations get tough? What strategies help you stay calm, even when the stakes are high?
Next up: #5 in the countdown. This one is all about a blind spot that quietly sabotages Carefrontation if we’re not intentional.
